10 Tips to Survive the Holi-daze

Make your holiday hell a lot more fun this year.

Surviving life itself is one thing, but surviving the holidays is a whole other beast. The last two months of the calendar year bring out the bat-shit-crazy in some folks, holiday hellhound in others, and yet finds many drowning their toxic family traits in a bottle of booze.

Sure you can have happy holidays, and if that’s you then you may not want to read on. Enjoy yourself today instead of listening to a cynical blue-haired girl who’s sick of capitalism, the patriarchy, and ridiculous societal expectations.

But, if you’re like me and feel more like the Grinch than a Happy Lil’ Elf, and would like to tell Santa just where he can shove his Ho’s, let’s work together to check ourselves before we wreck ourselves this holiday season, and perhaps we may just have a good time.

Here are 10 tips to surviving the holidays. Some are naughty, some are nice, do as ye will so long as ye harm none, and for fek’s sake, keep your ass out of jail.

Cheers, bithces.

Holiday Hell Survival Tips:

1. Just say NO. Unless it’s drugs. Then say YES. (KIDDING! Or not. Be safe y’all).